The Bible contains the directive “Do not fear” over two hundred times. The Torah’s most repeated commandment is al tirah, “Be not afraid.” The Big Book of Alcoholics Anonymous calls fear “An evil and corroding thread” that weaves its way through our lives.

But here’s the thing…..Fear is one of the most powerful motivating forces in the human experience.

It is the clarion call; it signals that there is something you need to change in order to live a completely fulfilled life.
Honoring this feeling is the greatest gift you can give yourself.

So, why do you ignore it? Fear is one of the strongest words in the human emotional language. We would rather say we are anxious, worried or nervous, than say outright we are afraid. Somehow the word fear connotes weakness or intense vulnerability, so we prefer to cloak it in ambiguous language like “I don’t feel like it,” “It doesn’t work for me”, or “I’m too busy, too tired, or too stressed.” Fear leads to anger, inappropriate behavior, offensive language or complete rejection. We find tons of excuses to avoid ‘feeling’ the fear because we all know that fear is alarming, abrasive, unpleasant and painful.

When kept in its rightful place, fear can be both instinctual and lifesaving. It can actually be a vital part of the human experience. In the case of an imminent attack, fear is your body’s alarm telling you, “There is danger here. Hide. Run. Fight back. Get help.” The action needed is decided by a quick evaluation of the circumstances.

But, for many people, fear has a warped place of prominence in their lives. There are innumerable versions of intense fear attached to specific experiences—phobias of certain things, such as spiders, airplanes, dogs, and public speaking. Phobic reactions put your mind on steroids, exaggerating the physical reaction to extraordinary heights. At any given moment this can be alarming, embarrassing, and absolutely crippling.

If you have too much fear stimulus, or if your life is filled with dangerous situations, the alarm goes haywire. It may sound constantly, or it might go off intermittently and at inappropriate times. One tragic aspect of a broken danger alarm is that it may not go off
when it should. What if your home’s fire alarm ignored smoke and flame, but rang wildly whenever you started the dishwasher?

Many people live with internal alarms that are just as broken. Fear has simply become a constant part of their life. It holds them in its grip, confining them to a life of limitation, of uncertainty and unhappiness. They may even enter one dangerous situation after another,
taking little notice of the hideous consequences coming their way. They don’t recognize obvious danger, but are terrified of everyday situations that develop into phobias. Perhaps they let fear stop them from applying for a new job—yet don’t register any fear when driving without a seatbelt, applying for another credit card, or giving an abusive husband one more chance.

Fear helps us to avoid suffering. If fear strikes when you feel a fire’s heat, you will position yourself away from the flames. Applying this to social situations, if someone important in your life has shamed you, you may avoid their friendship. If you were abused in any way, you learn not to trust. No one wants pain, discomfort, embarrassment, humiliation, or rejection, so in order to avoid the consequences, you create all kinds of reasons in your mind why you can’t go into a particular situation.

These reasons are the stories you tell yourself. They are the stories inherited from your parents or other significant people in your life. They are the stories you told yourself in order to avoid being hurt and disappointed. They are the stories that no longer serve you. They result in habits you have created that limit you in living your best life.

You can learn how to handle your fear, self-doubt and anxiety by making choices when fear shows up in your life, and practicing behaviors that minimize your conditioned reaction to these uncomfortable feelings that signal your need to run, defend, react and destroy in order to
avoid them.

You can learn to overcome fear, not by running away, but by standing your ground, deciding to make changes in our life, and building confidence by practicing new survival skills over and over again.

Fear can be an extraordinary motivating force when you see it as a challenge to change something that’s not working. In order to meet life’s demands and leap into your greatest dreams, you need to learn the real purpose of fear, where it has gone awry in your life, and how
you can direct it toward your future success.