The Fearless Factor | Overcome Fear Now

We are all a collection of stories.

Some of them are short stories and some of them are epic novels.

Whatever length these stories are, that’s our history and our influences. These are the conglomeration of experiences that make us who we are. Many times these stories were handed down to us by the people who were the most formative influences on our life; parents, grandparents, teachers, siblings, friends and employers.

We learned who we are by what they said about us.
We learned what we could do by using them as examples.
We learned what the world was all about by seeing it through their eyes.
And many times, we didn’t stop to question if it was right or wrong!

When I was growing up my father told me a hundred thousand times ( I didn’t keep count, but it was a lot!) that I wouldn’t amount to much. I would end up a waste of time, with an unhappy marriage, just like his, and I’d be broke, just like him. I’d get pregnant and not know who the father was, just like my mother, and I’d always be disappointed by life, because that’s just the way it is.

Interspersed with this ‘wisdom’ came raging alcoholic abuse because I dared to step out of line, because I dared to question, and because I didn’t know any better. My mother didn’t help matters. Her best advice was to stay out of his way. Don’t rock the boat. And definitely, don’t bother to dream, because you will be disappointed.

In elementary school, my math teacher told me I was a complete idiot because I could never understand the simplest math problems, and my English teacher told me I was lazy because I never handed my homework in on time.

We were poor so I learned that the only way to get things was to steal them, because my mother stole whisky from the distillery and my father stole food and whisky from the docks he worked in.

I learned how to lie to get what I wanted because nobody ever told you the truth about what was going on, and years later, when I discovered the stories, I understood why. They were too ashamed to step forward and reveal who they truly were.

If you grew up with a large dose of negativity, then that is your reality.

If you grew up listening to people complain all the time, berate other people, diminish your expectations and pigeon-hole you according to their limited beliefs, then you suffer the consequences of that. You grow smaller.

You don’t believe in yourself. You limit your world because of these influences. Or you rebel.

I chose to rebel, but it took its toll.

I did come home pregnant, just like my mother.
I did get caught stealing, just like my father.
I buried myself in drugs and alcohol to dull the pain, just like my father and my mother,
and I didn’t believe I would ever amount to much.

How wrong can you be? These stories led me down a path that was not of my choosing, or so I thought.

Do you find yourself telling the same old stories about why you can’t do something?

Is fear the cause?

There’s a familiarity to the story.

Not enough money,
not enough relationship,
my health isn’t good,
I’m too old,
too fat,
too tired.

I used to dream about a future that was better, but that was then, and this is reality.

I can’t have it.

I’m not capable,
I’m not worthy,
I’m not good enough,
I’m not qualified,
I’m not creative,

I’m not, I’m not, I’m not.

Is that the Yadda Yadda of your life?

I like to say we are all creating our own stories. We are making it up as we go along, but as we learn more about who we are, we make more conscious choices about what we want, and where we want to go……….

So what kind of story are you creating?

[If you'd like to read more, download the excerpt from The Fearless Factor and pre-order your copy of the book. Due out at the end of May.]

Tweet This Post Delicious Digg This Post Facebook Stumble This Post