This is the second day of my virtual book tour for The Fearless Factor book and people have been saying the nicest things about me.  Yesterday, Paula Russell of Paula’s Book Talk wrote a raving review of The Fearless Factor, and Dianne Ascroft did an interview with me to talk about What Women Want, which is basically to make our own decisions and choices and live a life of our own making.

Now the interesting thing about that particular idea is that, while we want to make our own decisions, we frequently don’t because we bow to the pressure or influence of other people first. And yet, I see it daily in my coaching practice when people say they don’t get what they want, because they never learned to ask for it. Part of the reason is they don’t want to look stupid, which is something I wrote about yesterday. Or they don’t want to appear too aggressive or greedy.  But mostly, it’s a self-esteem issue.

On the flip side of this, is when people are asked what they want, they frequently throw it back into the other court and say “what do you want?” as if pleasing the other person first will make your desires more acceptable.  We all know where that leads to, don’t we?  Resentment, anger, frustration.  The result of not asking for what you want.

And then there’s the compliment issue.

Are you someone who, when complimented, will give a long story as to why you don’t deserve it?  I used to do that until one day a therapist looked at me and said, “Jacqueline, there is only one thing to say.  Thank You. It’s simple.  Stop right there, say thank you, and move along.”

So if you’re like that, think about this:

• Someone thought you  made a difference in their lives…..  Thank you.
• Someone wants to congratulate you on a job well done…. Thank you.
• Someone wants to thank you for the kindness you showed…. Thank you.

So I want to take the time to say thank you to Paula and Diane today, and as I go through the next two months of talking to people about the book and the program, I say thank you to everyone for allowing me into your lives.   It is indeed an honor.  Thank you.